Remember when you could walk down the street without trampling lost-or-littered face masks? I fear my children will never see another fall where they don’t have to be careful of masks hidden amongst the piles of crisp golden leaves they play in… My 3-year-old is very jealous of her oh-so-cool big brothers who are, asContinue reading “Pandemic Musings”
Tag Archives: parenting
Tell me you’re a mom of young kids without telling me…
1. You fall asleep in the dentist’s chair even though, apparently, you have “severe” gingivitis (because you lost your floss months ago and keep forgetting to replace it so that you can at least pretend to have decent hygiene), a slight phobia of the dentist, and an Apple watch that keeps pinging you and whoContinue reading “Tell me you’re a mom of young kids without telling me…”
Just Your Typical Morning (Part 1)
4 AM: 2-yr-old comes into your bed screaming for yogurt. Because it’s breakfast time…You spend the next hour and a half explaining that no civilized human eats before the sun rises. 5:36: You relent and let 2-yr-old feast on crackers & yogurt in your bed. 6:30: You alarm goes off, which your husband doesn’t hear.Continue reading “Just Your Typical Morning (Part 1)”
Ways my Mother Wronged Me
If I would have been taken seriously, I would have answered the question “Why do you want to be a historian?” on the application to graduate school: “because of the American Girl dolls.” Instead, I BSed my way through the application (and my PhD program, for that matter) with some nonsense or other about changingContinue reading “Ways my Mother Wronged Me”
Parenting Perks
Sure, I haven’t used the bathroom alone in 6 years. I’ve had to jump off the pot mid-use, pants around my ankles to break up a fight or save a child from certain death more times than I can count. But you know what else hasn’t happened for the last 6 years of potty-going? IContinue reading “Parenting Perks”
Giving Up
The other night for dinner I served my children popcorn, corn chips, guacamole and grapes. On the floor. In front of the TV. I had spent the last 12 hrs listening to whining, leaping to keep tiny fingers from getting crushed in doors, and holding my shit together so that the primal scream in myContinue reading “Giving Up”
Silver Linings
I’m tired of hearing myself complain. There must have been a time in my life when surviving until bedtime wasn’t my daily goal. Mentally healthy people are always preaching things like “smile more” (the most annoying) and “think positive.” Well, I’m a glass-half-empty kind of gal, but it can’t hurt to try, right? So hereContinue reading “Silver Linings”
Worry Checklist – a Day in the Life
•Am I failing my children?•Will my 6-yr-old ever learn to ride a bike?•Why won’t 6-yr-old wipe his own butt? Is it a fine or gross motor problem? Does he need OT? Is he just lazy? Does he need regular therapy?•Should I register for Weight Watchers? Will my therapist be disappointed in my? Does intuitive eatingContinue reading “Worry Checklist – a Day in the Life”
Dinner Struggles
Can you believe you have to feed your kids Every. Single. Day? You feed them dinner one night, and for some reason they want dinner again the next day. Dinner with my kids is so loathsome to me that I start having anxiety around 4 PM. What will I make for them? Will they eatContinue reading “Dinner Struggles”
I'm Worried My Therapist Hates Me: A neurotic millennial's musings and doodles on life, parenthood, and the myriad ways she can blame her mother for her troubles. 