imworriedmytherapisthatesme

Black Death

Sometimes in the evening when I’m struggling to bathe my children – which in my house entails wrestling, screaming, crying and endless (often unsuccessful) reminders that, no, we never drink the dirty bath water, and, yes, I am indeed sure that the only place we poop is the potty – I wish we lived atContinue reading “Black Death”

Best Effort

I’ve never won anything in my life. But that’s only because best grade on an English essay counts for squat. There was the time I thought I had won an all-expense paid cruise, but that turned out to be a scam, and is also probably the reason I’ve gotten about a million fake calls everyContinue reading “Best Effort”

Baking with Mom

“Baking is a science, Jessie! It’s chemistry.” I heard my mother reprimanding my every time I pull out my mixer. “What are you doing? You can’t use your finger to flatten the flour. You must use a straight edge. Be precise.” And she wonders why I detest all domestic activities in the kitchen? God forbidContinue reading “Baking with Mom”

Mirror, mirror…

It’s strange to think that there was a time when only the wealthiest owned a mirror, or an object meant to reflect one’s image. Mirrors are ancient tools – yet the thin piece of glass with a layer of reflective metal behind it that we think of as a mirror is a relatively recent invention.Continue reading “Mirror, mirror…”

And you think you’ve got sleep problems?

Before the Industrial Revolution and the creation of better forms of artificial light, people had to make the most of the natural light. Which meant in bed by sunset. When I try to explain to my husband that my body simply is not strong enough to resist nature and therefore I cannot possibly help withContinue reading “And you think you’ve got sleep problems?”

The Trouble with Sushi…

Friday nights are date nights. For us, with 3 kids under 6, during a pandemic, this means we order a giant platter of sushi and eat it in front of whatever show Netflix has been telling us to watch all week. Sometimes I eat a magic gummy when the kids are in the bath andContinue reading “The Trouble with Sushi…”

My new BFF

Y’all, I have a new best friend. We’ve never officially met, but Robin and I spend time together every day. I think we may spend more time together than my husband and I. And that has to mean something, right? I have NEVER liked to exercise. In fact, I looked down on people who claimedContinue reading “My new BFF”

“…and I get my ya-ya’s at IKEA” -Chandler Bing

Have you ever driven to an IKEA simply to dine in the wonderfully-decorated cafeteria? Yeah…me neither…BUT if I HAD, it was only because this food utopia was just 15 min out of the way of where we were going anyway. And the meatballs are really THAT good. And, I don’t get the appeal of Chick-fil-A.Continue reading ““…and I get my ya-ya’s at IKEA” -Chandler Bing”

NYC

I love NYC. I consider myself a Native Upper West Side Jew, even though I was born in Chicago and have only ever lived there for a summer. But my grandparents have an apartment there (it is a tiny 1st floor, beautifully decorated cave where light goes to die) so I’ve spent enough time inContinue reading “NYC”

Seasonal Anxieties

Spring is the most confusing and conflicted season. It is all about rebirth, hope, resurrection. The flowers bloom, the birds chirp – the trees have those bright-green-almost-yellow baby leaves, which are so much better than the overgrown, humid foliage of July and August. And yet, because spring is so wonderful, I can’t help but angstContinue reading “Seasonal Anxieties”