You know you’re not a candidate for hard core drugs when a puff of Mary Jane causes you to see Sebastian from the Little Mermaid riding through the room in his seashell chariot. I tend to experience an uncomfortable sensation of circling through time – my own time, not like real history – but time, nonetheless. I’ve also been known to eat an entire pot of goat cheese pasta, right from the stove. With the serving spoon. I don’t think my friends or family would describe my baked brain as smarter (or functional), but I present this poem to share with the world some of my deepest, most profound thinking. These words were written many moons ago – before kids or marriage – during an especially upsetting episode of time travel. We were watching that nonsensical Charlie Sheen interview – which I had seen previously and knew to be insane. But it suddenly all made sense to me – Charlie Sheen was speaking truth. And that’s when I panicked. I sensed that those around me weren’t taking me seriously. I also knew in my heart that the thoughts I was having were as close to TRUTH as I’d ever come. So I grabbed paper and pen to preserve my insight, to document the clarity I was sure I had grasped…
Only vaguely have a concept of the future
Going back in forth in time
Seeing myself, my seat and my time from various perspectives
My thoughts keep getting erased
Where am I?
Know one [sic] has experienced this – why doesn’t anyone feel it – I know this is different
Knowing when/how to act w/o my brain—Jessie w/o Jessie
Many me’s in me
Am I functioning?
In and out of time
How long is it taking?
Most important thoughts
Not wanting to be put to death w/ Alzheimer’s—lucidity of time
Cookies—small, hard cakes